#50 Tuning in to your child's communication
Communication takes many forms. Singing or humming can be an effective communication tool for some children. Tuning in to your child's song or tunes can lead to successful communication, so give it a go and try singing!
In my previous post I wrote about Intensive Interaction as an early social communication approach and Alternative and Augmentative Communication (AAC) approaches such as PECS which aim to develop functional communication. Whilst these are important aspects to consider at home, there are also other ways which may enable you to 'tune in' to your child's unique ways of communicating.
Communication is the intentional sending of messages, with an expectation that the receiver of the message will respond. However, it may be that your child does not yet communicate intentionally. Nevertheless, by tuning in to your child you can respond to them as if they had intentionally communicated a message to you.
Tuning in to your child's unique ways of communicating can enrich communication at home in ways which both your child, you and other members of the family can enjoy. Tuning in to your child's ways of communicating not only values their uniqueness and communication efforts but also enhances your own ways of communicating with them.
Singing and humming
I have worked with many children who did not speak, but who would regularly sing or hum. Tuning in to your child's singing and/or humming can be helpful in understanding what your child might be communicating. Singing/humming can also be a good way for you to communicate with your child.
Understanding your child's singing/humming Watch and listen when your child sings/hums. Note the context(s) throughout the day when they sing, note the songs/tunes they use, tune in to other clues such as body movements which may indicate a communication message. When you feel you are able to interpret the communication message (whether it was intended or not), then you can respond according to that message. For example, you may notice that your child sings or hums a specific song/tune when they are anxious - tune in to the message "I feel anxious" and respond to their anxiety, for example by providing your child with one of their sensory soothers. Another example, your child may sing/hum when they are happy, tune in to the message "I am happy" and consider joining in by singing/humming alongside your child, thus showing your child that you value their communication and want to share in their happy feelings.
Of course you may not always 'read' the message correctly, but the more you tune in to what your child may be trying to communicate, the more successful you will be at tuning in to their communication messages. Likewise, the more you tune in to your child's communication, the more they are likely to notice you as a communication partner. By tuning in to your child, noticing their communication through singing/humming and attributing intent to send a message, the more your child may begin to use singing/humming to communicate with you.
Singing and humming to communicate messages to your childJust as important as tuning in to your child's singing/humming, so you can also use songs and tunes to communicate messages to your child. Songs and tunes can be a great way of communicating about routines. Many children (and adults) I have worked with have understood the timing of routine events by recognising songs/tunes associated with these events. There are key routines at home when you could use songs/tunes to help your child to understand 'what's next'. Songs/tunes can give a warning in advance of an activity/event and then be used to help your child to transition from one activity/event to the next. You may think this is not necessary if your child already uses a visual schedule, but songs for routines can be a useful warning signal that it is time to transition and/or check their schedule.
If you are not currently using songs, start by introducing a song/tune to indicate a routine activity. For example try singing "this is the way we brush our teeth" to the tune of 'here we go round the mulberry bush' during teeth-brushing. When you feel your child recognises and associates the song/tune with the activity of brushing their teeth, use the song/tune to indicate it is time to brush their teeth. For example, if your child is playing with some toys you might slowly begin to pack the toys away while humming/singing - start by softly singing/humming and gradually increase the volume as you gently usher your child to the bathroom to begin brushing their teeth.
Some youngsters may reject the use of objects or pictures, perhaps pushing them away by means of saying "no". Songs to communicate the message that it is time for an activity can feel less confrontational for some children and, where they may usually resist, you may find they are able to process the message of the song/tune and make the transition more successfully and in a more relaxed manner.
When your child is familiar with songs for routine activities, you might go on to introduce an object or picture. Sing/hum the routine song and at the same time show your child the object (e.g. toothbrush) or picture card. In this way you are still using the familiar way (song/tune) of communicating your message, but introducing an alternative way of communicating which may become meaningful for your child as a precursor to using a visual schedule.
Try introducing simple songs for routine activities at home as an additional or alternative way of communicating with your child. Make up simple words to familiar tunes or nursery rhymes and use repetition to link the song to a specific routine activity.
A final word about connecting and communicating through musicSinging and humming can be meaningful communication tools for you and your child. In addition, songs, tunes and rhythms can be powerful ways of connecting with your child. Musical interactions can be powerful in developing communication, as illustrated in this music therapy film:
Whilst most of us are not music therapists, spending time with your child when you connect as communication partners through songs, rhythms and music is quality learning time and can be enjoyable for both of you.
So give singing a go and have fun!
Communication takes many forms. Singing or humming can be an effective communication tool for some children. Tuning in to your child's song or tunes can lead to successful communication, so give it a go and try singing!
In my previous post I wrote about Intensive Interaction as an early social communication approach and Alternative and Augmentative Communication (AAC) approaches such as PECS which aim to develop functional communication. Whilst these are important aspects to consider at home, there are also other ways which may enable you to 'tune in' to your child's unique ways of communicating.
Communication is the intentional sending of messages, with an expectation that the receiver of the message will respond. However, it may be that your child does not yet communicate intentionally. Nevertheless, by tuning in to your child you can respond to them as if they had intentionally communicated a message to you.
Tuning in to your child's unique ways of communicating can enrich communication at home in ways which both your child, you and other members of the family can enjoy. Tuning in to your child's ways of communicating not only values their uniqueness and communication efforts but also enhances your own ways of communicating with them.
Singing and humming
I have worked with many children who did not speak, but who would regularly sing or hum. Tuning in to your child's singing and/or humming can be helpful in understanding what your child might be communicating. Singing/humming can also be a good way for you to communicate with your child.
Understanding your child's singing/humming
Watch and listen when your child sings/hums. Note the context(s) throughout the day when they sing, note the songs/tunes they use, tune in to other clues such as body movements which may indicate a communication message. When you feel you are able to interpret the communication message (whether it was intended or not), then you can respond according to that message. For example, you may notice that your child sings or hums a specific song/tune when they are anxious - tune in to the message "I feel anxious" and respond to their anxiety, for example by providing your child with one of their sensory soothers. Another example, your child may sing/hum when they are happy, tune in to the message "I am happy" and consider joining in by singing/humming alongside your child, thus showing your child that you value their communication and want to share in their happy feelings.
Of course you may not always 'read' the message correctly, but the more you tune in to what your child may be trying to communicate, the more successful you will be at tuning in to their communication messages. Likewise, the more you tune in to your child's communication, the more they are likely to notice you as a communication partner. By tuning in to your child, noticing their communication through singing/humming and attributing intent to send a message, the more your child may begin to use singing/humming to communicate with you.
Singing and humming to communicate messages to your child
Just as important as tuning in to your child's singing/humming, so you can also use songs and tunes to communicate messages to your child. Songs and tunes can be a great way of communicating about routines. Many children (and adults) I have worked with have understood the timing of routine events by recognising songs/tunes associated with these events. There are key routines at home when you could use songs/tunes to help your child to understand 'what's next'. Songs/tunes can give a warning in advance of an activity/event and then be used to help your child to transition from one activity/event to the next. You may think this is not necessary if your child already uses a visual schedule, but songs for routines can be a useful warning signal that it is time to transition and/or check their schedule.
If you are not currently using songs, start by introducing a song/tune to indicate a routine activity. For example try singing "this is the way we brush our teeth" to the tune of 'here we go round the mulberry bush' during teeth-brushing. When you feel your child recognises and associates the song/tune with the activity of brushing their teeth, use the song/tune to indicate it is time to brush their teeth. For example, if your child is playing with some toys you might slowly begin to pack the toys away while humming/singing - start by softly singing/humming and gradually increase the volume as you gently usher your child to the bathroom to begin brushing their teeth.
Some youngsters may reject the use of objects or pictures, perhaps pushing them away by means of saying "no". Songs to communicate the message that it is time for an activity can feel less confrontational for some children and, where they may usually resist, you may find they are able to process the message of the song/tune and make the transition more successfully and in a more relaxed manner.
Try introducing simple songs for routine activities at home as an additional or alternative way of communicating with your child. Make up simple words to familiar tunes or nursery rhymes and use repetition to link the song to a specific routine activity.
A final word about connecting and communicating through music
Singing and humming can be meaningful communication tools for you and your child. In addition, songs, tunes and rhythms can be powerful ways of connecting with your child. Musical interactions can be powerful in developing communication, as illustrated in this music therapy film:
Whilst most of us are not music therapists, spending time with your child when you connect as communication partners through songs, rhythms and music is quality learning time and can be enjoyable for both of you.
So give singing a go and have fun!
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