Post #26 Social Stories & Articles - Kindness & Being Kind

Kindness & being kind have benefits for physical and mental health. Finding ways to help autistic children and young people to understand these concepts is important for developing positive relationships and for their wellbeing. Social Stories & Articles are an engaging way to teach about kindness.

Social Stories or Articles (for those individuals who feel that stories are immature or are lies because they are not true!) are a useful way of sharing information about kindness & being kind with your child. Social Stories are written carefully and following guidelines provided by Carol Gray, the founder of the approach. This post is not about teaching you how to write a Social Story, but to illustrate how Social Stories can be developed to teach autistic children about kindness. For more information about Social Stories and guidelines for writing, see: Carol Gray - What is a Social Story? or National Autistic Society - Social Stories

The following example of a Social Story illustrates the approach for a young child or an individual at an early stage of development. 

Pictures with permission from Twinkl

This Social Story uses descriptive sentences & pictures which explain & illustrate what the child does which is kind. For some youngsters the pictures used in this example would be meaningless as the objects and people depicted do not look the same as at home. Try taking photos of your child carrying out kind activities as these will be more meaningful. If your child is a symbol user, you might replace the pictures with symbols. The story also includes perspective sentences which explain how the person feels as a result of the child being kind.This is important as it starts to show simple cause and effect - when I do something kind, this makes the other person feel xxx. Note that repetition of the phrase 'this is being kind' reinforces the concept. The final two sentences include a directive sentence (I will try to be kind), followed by a perspective sentence (I make other people happy when I am kind) which reinforces cause and effect.

The next example illustrates how a Social Article might be informative and helpful in clarifying concepts.

Kindness Kindness is defined in the Cambridge English dictionary as: 1) the quality of being gentle, caring and helpful & 2) a kind action. A thesaurus search identifies a number of alternative words for kindness including: kind-heartedness, benevolence, consideration, compassion, altruism. The Mental Health Foundation states that: “Kindness is choosing to do something that helps others or yourself, motivated by genuine warm feelings. Kindness, or doing good, often means putting other people’s needs before our own. It could be by giving up our seat on a bus to someone who might need it more, or offering to make a cup of tea for someone at work.” https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/campaigns/mental-health-awareness-week/kindness-matters-guide Kindness can be seen in both actions and words. Acts of kindness are of benefit to the person receiving and the person giving the kindness. The Mental Heath Foundations gives 5 health benefits of kindness: helps others to feel good; creates sense of belonging & reduces isolation; helps keep things in perspective, doing good may help you to have a more positive outlook about your own circumstances; helps make the world a happier place, an act of kindness can increase confidence, happiness & optimism; the more you do for others, the more you do for yourself, acts of kindness give good feelings to the receiver and the giver. Ways to show kindness Here are some examples of acts and words of kindness that give good feelings to others. There are lots more example in the Kindness Matters Guide. Acts of kindness Helping a neighbour to carry their shopping from the car. Hanging out the washing for a parent. Sending an email to a relative. Helping a friend with their homework. Volunteering at a food bank. Words of kindness Paying compliments, for example “I like your new hair style” or “that’s a great piece of work”. Reassuring words, for example “don’t worry, I will help you”. Expressing sympathy, for example “I am sorry you have a bad headache, I hope you feel better soon.” Sometimes other people may need help or may feel upset, worried or sad. When people feel like this, it is a good idea to carry out an act of kindness. This could be by doing something for the person and/or offering words of kindness. I want to support Mental Health Awareness Week 18th – 24th May 2020. I will try to offer one act of kindness a day and hope that my kindness will give good feelings to others. I will try to continue with this when Mental Health Awareness Week is finished as it is a sign of good character. Kindness spreads good feelings and increases wellbeing.

This article includes interests (love of dictionary definitions, thesaurus & using websites) which add motivation. There are many descriptive sentences which use language and vocabulary appropriate for the reader. In addition, examples are included to clarify concepts. Perspective sentences indicate how words and actions can affect another person, aiming to strengthen perspective-taking abilities, i.e. the ability to see something from another person's point of view. This is particularly important as many autistic youngsters can find this challenging. Enhancing perspective-taking abilities can improve the quality of relationships by providing explanations for how/why other people behave and feel in specific circumstances. Directive sentences  are used to encourage the individual to commit to trying something - this may be a personal challenge (as in this example in which the individual wants to be part of a campaign) or something that an individual might usually resist, but that either needs to be done or would improve the quality of their relationships. An article like this should be drafted and edited in collaboration with the person you are writing it for.

Social Stories and Articles can be an effective approach, but they do not work by magic! They often require multiple drafts as you share with the individual and they give their feedback. Some individuals may need to read a story or article multiple times.  If you son or daughter likes this approach, encourage them to collect their Social Stories or Articles so they can re-read. Facilitate ownership of the stories or articles by encouraging your son or daughter to contribute, e.g., by drawing pictures, researching a topic to add examples and so on. Put time and effort into personalising a story or article as these will be more likely to succeed.

If this approach is of further interest, see posts on preparing your son or daughter for going back to schools, including a 3 part Social Story with symbols.